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A sort-of Fairytale

conversationswithhank.com

 

(Once upon a time, after a very stressful evening of homework and tantrums and nonsense a family of three sat down to dinner, but unlike most evening something strange was afoot)

Me: Um.

Pai: (chewing)

Me: Alfredo?

Pai: Hum?

Me: Can I ask you something and have you not take it personally?

Hank: (sad, pouty, exhausted and not paying attention)

Pai: Yes.

Me: Did you make a deal with the devil today?

Pai: Excuse me?

Me: Shall we change you name to Dr. Faustus?

Pai:

Me: (pointing to his forehead) You are clearly growing a horn.

Hank: Pai (dad)?

Pai: (lifting his hair and showing Hank) Eu tenho um borbulhia na minha testa. (I have a pimple on my forehead.)

Me: OH! Did you accidentally step into a fairy ring and get taken to their world? Did you eat their food? That’s it, isn’t it? You should never eat fairy food.

Hank: It’s a pimple.

Me: Are you sure, because look at the placement. It is clearly a horn sprout. Clearly he is in mid-transformation and I bet tomorrow he will start growing the right horn as well.

Hank: It’s a pimple.

Me: Nope. Can’t be. Much too massive.

Pai: (throws napkin in my face)

Me: (hysterically laughing) See! He is BEWITCHED! (throw napkin back) Quick Hank! Protect me from the budding Satyr!

Pai: (laughing)

Hank: (finally laughing after an evening of fits, sobs and sadness)

(and napkins lead to pillows and pillows lead to hysterically laughing until our dinner was cold, but we happily ate it anyway, horns and all. The End.)

 

 

 

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You can’t learn piano from your mother

conversationswithhank.com

 

Hank: But why did Euclides come over here to do his TPC (homework)?

Pai: He has a big test soon and needed help.

Me: And you can’t learn piano from your mother.

Pai: Excuse me?

Hank: Huh?

Me: It is something my mom and grandma use to say. Because Euclides came here to work with your papa he was able to review and work for two solid hours. He got so much done and better understood some things that were challenging for him. Do you think you would be able to sit and do two hours of homework with your Pai (dad), Hank?

Hank:

Me: Without having a tantrum, getting frustrated or needed a time out?

Pai: Oh, I get it.

Hank: Um. Truth? No.

Me: Exactly. When something is very stressful and challenging it is better to seek help from a friend, hence the expression, “you can’t learn piano from your mother.”

Pai: Wise words.

Me: My grandmother was an amazing pianist and a music teacher, but my mother went to another woman for her piano and flute lessons.

Hank: Flute?

Pai: Flauta (flute).

Hank: My Grammy plays the flauta (flute), too?

Me: Yes. This came in very handy when I was going through my Jethro Tull phase. Anyway… My mother didn’t learn piano from my grammy and I went to the organist from my grandmother’s church for my piano lessons.

Hank: But you don’t play the piano.

Me: Yes… I tried, but I had a huge problem making my left hand do something completely independent from my right and that is important when playing the piano, but I am pretty handy with a guitar.

Hank: And you can draw anything.

Me: Yup.

Hank: So who will I do my math with when I am 12?

Pai: Maybe Euclides, maybe someone else, but what is more important right now is who is Jethro Tull?

Me: Seriously? Oh man (googleing) you boys are in for a rare treat.

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Long after bedtime

conversationswithhank.com

 

Hank: (walks into living room)

Me: Hey, buddy.

Pai: Why are you not asleep?

Hank: No one gave me a start of a dream and my imagination has been turned off.

Me: Oh!

Pai: Well…

Me: Um… I think you should dream of the animation we love with the clouds in rain boots and the happy raindrops as it is currently raining.

Pai: And I think you should dream of… (pause) flying.

Hank: (sleepily) I can do both. (turning to go) Good night.

Us: Good night.