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Our Hank, A Man of Little Years.

conversations with hank

Me: (barely awake, bed head, eyes not even open) Good morning, Hank.

Hank: (chipper as a squirrel, fully dressed, hair done, breakfast of an egg over easy and toast made by himself already eaten) Good morning, mama!

Me: (audible groan)

Hank: Mama, I am watching a YouTube video about if New York City apartments are worth it at their price. They go to three apartments and the first one was so cute. She only pays $1,700 a month.

Me: Jesus and the Mary Chain!

Hank: But MOM it’s New York City.

Me: I don’t think my heart can take this conversation before coffee.

Hank: The girl said she could barely afford her apartment, but that she felt it was totally worth it.

Me: (rubbing the sleep from my eyes) The average rent in Lisbon is now €850.

Hank: Yes, but mom, it’s Lisbon.

Me: (super sassy because this conversation is hurting my soul) Yes, but Hank the average rent in Lisbon has increased dramatically. When we moved here in 2010 you could get a two bedroom apartment for around €600. The average rent for an apartment close to the university in Guimarães is about that!

Hank: Oh.

Me: Yah… And speaking of rents and moving. (yawn) I am considering letting you move into the guest room sooner than we originally agreed.

Hank: WHAT?!

Me: With the caveat that when we have a guest you go right back into your old room.

Hank: But why? I mean, I thought I had to wait until I was thirteen.

Me: Originally, yes. I adore your sister, but you two are completely different people and she talks and sings for a full hour or more before she finally settles down. It’s hard for your papa and I a room away, but I can only imagine how hard it is for you when you want to sleep.

Hank: (giggles) Yah, she does go on and on and on.

Me: I am still thinking about it, but after the holidays if she doesn’t settle down more then I think we should give you your own space.

Hank: (thinking rather loudly)

Me: (desperate for coffee)

Hank:

Me:

Hank: Mama, I don’t think I’m ready.

Me: (listening)

Hank: I think I should stay in our shared room for a while longer. My sister needs me and I want to be there for her when we turn her crib into a bed and really I don’t mind her singing, it doesn’t really keep me up, and maybe we can try and get her to bed earlier than me? I can get ready for bed with her like we do now, but then we three can put her to bed and I can read or watch my novella (soap opera) and she can fall asleep and then I can creep in quietly later.

Me: Also very smart and thoughtful suggestions.

Hank: Trust me, I WANT to move into the guest room that is my dream, but I’m just not ready for that dream to come true yet.

Me: (impressed) Noted.

Molly: (from their shared bedroom as if she knew we were talking about her) Mano (brother)? Maaannnooo (brother)?

Me: Oofta! Someone’s awake already? (looking at my bare wrist where my watch would be later because: no coffee)

Hank: Can I go and get her?

Me: By all means.

Hank: (dashes off)

Molly: (sing-songy) Mano?

Hank: Good morning, little chicken!

Molly: Chicken mano (brother)!

Hank: Are you ready to get up?

Molly: SIM (YES)!

Hank: Okay, here we go! One… Two…

Molly: Freeeee!

(Enjoy a parody tutorial/advice video from, Bumba na Fofina, a Portuguese comedian from Lisbon who also laments the current housing prices)