Me: And how was your swimming dream? (walking over to open the curtains and the shades)
Molly: I swim with Chuva (which means rain and is the name of Molly’s favorite stuffed duck toy).
Me: I bet Chuva is a wonderful swimming partner, but tell me, do you get cold in the night?
Me: Well, my darling girl, when you and Chuva get cold in your swimming dreams you need to say to yourself, “Wake up! Wake up!” and when you wake up you need to reach out and find covers and blankets and pull them on top of you, because no matter how hard I tuck you in at night you always break free by the morning.
Me: Can you show me how strong you are? Can you pull a blanket on top of you?
Molly: (with much grunting and effort pulls her comforter from the floor on top of herself) I did it!
Me: Well done! Bravo!
Molly: I strong, mama.
Me: You are. Now, MaGoo we have a job to do for Tia Adriana (Molly’s Nanny).
Me: But Pai Natal (Santa) loves letters in his mailbox. He lives very far away where it is cold and there is lots of snow.
Molly: Cartões no correio (cards in the mail)!
Me: Exactly! And your Tia Adriana wants to send Pai Natal (Santa) some mail from you so he can hear what kind of magic you want papa, mano (brother) and I to make for you since he won’t be coming to our house.
Me: So Amália Sofia, what would you like for Christmas?
Molly: Um… Ah… Ah… Candies and Chocolate and Halloween and Happy! (nodding)
Me: (beaming) What a magical Christmas wish!
Molly: (snuggling into her blankets, pulling them over her head, muffled) I wish. I Christmas wish!
Me: I do, but I don’t feel that creating Paige Portensia was lying. I feel I made magic for you and for me. It was magical the look on your face, the way your heart sang because you had a door in your house where magic seeped through. It is your choice to stop believing and I respect that.
Hank: But is wasn’t real.
Me: Yes, it was.
Hank: But you did it not fairies.
Me: That doesn’t mean that magic isn’t real.
Hank: (disdain) You really still believe in magic and fairies?
Me: I do. I really do. I am being entirely sincere, because magic is real as long as I believe in it and as long as I help make magic for other people. Magic is like art. There are two ways of looking at art: one is with wonder and the other is with indifference. Those full of wonder marvel at a work of art and it moves them as only the piece can move that special, individual soul and those who live indifferent to art look at it and think, “I could have made that. What’s so special about that? How could that fetch millions of dollars?” It’s the same with magic.
Hank: I am mad, a bit, but I am more sad since I loved it all so much. I am sad it is over.
Me: But why is it over?
Hank: What do you mean? I know none of it was real!
Me: Ah, yes. I did write letters and collect your beautiful drawings and teeth, but part of the glory of magic is making it for others. And look over there at that silly, romping, little sister. You can advise me to the contrary, but I have a sneaking suspicion that she is going to love our fairy door and all the magic that you and I can make for her. That we can make together… if you wish.
Molly: (poking the creek bottom with a rather long stick, enraptured with stirring up algae)
Hank: I think I don’t know how I feel.
Me: And that is perfectly okay.
Hank: I think I am going to want her to believe. I think I still want to believe and am mad I have to grow up!
Me: But why do you have to grow up?
Hank: MOOOOOM, seriously.
Me: Oh, but I am being serious. Dead serious. Growing up is a trap. If you are 95 years old and not looking for dragons hiding in castle corners I feel epically sorry for you.
Hank: Really mom?!
Me: Truly. You can be mature, serious, own a house and a car, have children, a career and pay all your bills every month, but if you have no magic in your life, no whimsy, no delight in nonsense and far too few belly laughs I pity you. With the depths of my soul I am the richest woman I know because I still believe and therefore I live a magical life.
Me: Thank you for not being too angry with me, Hank, I couldn’t bare it. And besides (putting my arm around his shoulder) we had so much fun, didn’t we?